Editorial Notes = clarifying information, additional insight, annotations

Hiya Reader,

I'm old enough to remember when neither alcohol nor medications were advertised on television. The latter group of ads always makes me laugh when the announcer speeds through the disclaimers. They always remind me of this classic SNL spoof commercial for a children's toy with the ominous disclaimer: "Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball"!

As a copy editor (and former aspiring law student with a deep love for rules), I read a LOT of disclaimers. So when I found this link to the Terms of Service About page, I fell into a deep hole and am not sure I've emerged quite yet.

The site explains and evaluates the terms of service and policies pages of disclaimers from popular companies, ones you've most definitely agreed to without reading. Searchable by company, you get a breakdown and rating for the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Sony, for example, may transfer information to third parties — including to those in other countries — and does not have any control or interest in those third parties' privacy practices. Airbnb ignores your request to "do not track."

I'm not picking on just these two: besides itself, ToS About only scores one company as more heavily weighted toward "good" items than "bad" and free from any "ugly" ones.

You've been warned!
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Example of the Week

Sometimes this is a good example—or a great one. Sometimes this is a bad example—or just a funny blooper. Sometimes a combination. You never know.

A cautionary tale in one image:

Funny in hindsight, but less so if you’re the one who “paid for” the mistake.

A single missed detail can derail an otherwise solid piece of work. No one is perfect, of course, but a slip-up can also be a clear sign we simply aren't reading — or crafting our work — carefully enough.

As much as we’d all like to blame the metaphorical drop shipper, the responsibility usually lies closer to home.

Actionable Tip of the Week

A trick to add to your self-editing toolbox right now!

We don't always read carefully — or truly grasp what we've read.

In terms of the "fine print," reading carefully can produce a very good outcome: Remember the Georgia teacher who won $10,000 in 2019 just for reading the fine print of a travel insurance policy and being the first to email the company?

or a very bad one: in 2014, six people "agreed to assign their first born child to [the company] for the duration of eternity” in exchange for free WiFi. (This was a wonderfully named albeit unenforceable "Herod clause," inserted to showcase the inherent security issues associated with such services.)

Disclaimers and fine print aside, we often allow our eyes to skim over the words on the page (or screen) without truly taking in the meaning. Ever had the experience of reading the same paragraph or page over and over and over again without knowing what you've read? This happens to me when I'm distracted...but more for our self-editing purposes here, it also happens when I'm overly familiar with what I think I've said.

As writers, we tend to get swept up in the narrative or tangled in the ideas in our head. To read closely and evaluate what a reader actually has in front of them to read, don your editor hat. 🎩

Highlight key items, circle patterns (imagery, phrasing, anything that repeats), and scribble questions in the margins. Ask: what am I doing here? Why this structure? Why this language? Does this repeat too much — or not enough?

Summarize each segment — whether that's a paragraph or a chapter — in three parts: What’s the main idea? What’s the tone? What’s the point? It sounds simple, but it forces you to zero in on the core of the piece—and how well you (or the legal team) delivered it.

Reader Question of the Week

Jenifer wrote: My self editing struggle is knowing whether I'm using enough detail vs. including too much fluff. I'm never quite sure if I'm striking the right balance.

Jenifer! This is one of the most common questions I get, and the issue is quite nuanced. Different genres require different details, as do different audiences, different purposes, different voices, and so on, so I can't offer a one-size-fits-all answer.

Start with crystal clarity on your intention.

Do your details have a clear purpose to enhance reader engagement or clarify tone? Do they paint a solid image or evoke a specific emotion? Or do they just kind of fill the space with dust-collecting knick-knacks? Are they vague or do they hold valuable, necessary meaning?

I like to imagine a typical hotel room. The furnishings and framed art fall into one of two camps: strictly functional or strictly decorative.

Contrast this with your favorite room at home. You've chosen the mattress, the sheets, the covers and pillows, the frame — all to provide the best night's sleep possible for you. The art you've hung is similarly meaningful, not just clutter. Maybe you purchased a painting at an art fair because it reminded you of the meadow outside your grandmother's house, or maybe you have family photos prominently displayed?

Hotels are generic. Even the most luxurious places are not designed to be memorable in the details in and of themselves. But our homes are. That's intention.

If the words in your writing are hotel rooms, they are probably fluff. If they are the narrative's "home," they are probably vivid detail.

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Link of the Week

In case you missed last week's announcement, my course First Impressions: Craft Irresistible Beginnings that Grab Readers and Make Editors Say Yes! is available for preorder!

(That's three exclamation marks in a row, so you know it's exciting!) (Oops: four.)

The first sentence of your essay, story, novel, or memoir isn’t just an introduction— it’s a handshake, a promise, a hook. This course is all about helping you master the art of beginnings, from that perfect opening line to the first page that keeps readers turning.

With hands-on exercises, examples from standout writing, and live feedback sessions, you’ll leave with practical tools to make your all-important openings irresistible.

The deeply discounted preorder pricing will disappear soon, so if this topic sparks interest and joy (and it should) grab your spot now and be notified the moment it's available! (ETA: soon! Spring 2025!)

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I ❤️ Hearing from You!

Comments? Just reply to this email or click this link. I respond to every email—that's a promise.

Thanks for reading!

~Helene, your writing sherpa

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